Not Funny

When someone makes a joke on an insensitive topic, we often respond with “Not funny,” and the expectation is that the person who made the joke recognises the insensitivity of the topic and either stops joking about it or talks about it neutrally. The grin vanishes.

We think we’ve won when we shut others up by saying things like “That’s not funny” or “You shouldn’t laugh about it.” Such occasions, in my opinion, should be viewed as opportunities to examine one’s inner self. We already use a large filter when we look at others and display ourselves. Everything is according to social convention, the code, from how we talk to what we talk about. A rulebook’s downside is that it eliminates the possibility of uncertainty and chance. The exploration trails have come to an end.

Shutting people up about their jokes can definitely improve the atmosphere, and it’s a wonderful thing to do in some instances, but it rarely alters the person from within. The beliefs are unchanged; it’s just that they’re less vocal about it.

On a personal level, the extremes of talks influence my decisions concerning interpersonal connections. It’s not about how I can modify people to be the way I want them to be; it’s about noticing them and understanding what I’m getting myself into.